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Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Creative Writing: Write on Wednesday

Gill over at inkpenpaper has taken us all in yet another direction. Today's starter is simply a single word:

A state of vexation caused by a perceived slight or indignity; a feeling of wounded piqued, piqu·ing, piques
1. To cause to feel resentment or indignation.
2. To provoke; arouse: The portrait piqued her curiosity.
3. To pride (oneself): He piqued himself on his stylish attire.

This word came with lots of freedom. The usual 5 minute guideline was there, but Gill just encouraged us to get creative. With that encouragement, I found myself rolling "piqued" round in my mouth and mind all day. Just to see what would fly to it, and what might stick. I found Meg was in my thinking again, and I wanted to find out a bit about her boys.

Folded together in an almost yoga-knot, Meg sent her arm out round Bryn's shoulders to turn the page. Page turning just really wasn't the main purpose of sharing a book. Well, not for Meg. Snuggling and stroking were undoubtedly the main business. Lovely though the book was, it was an excuse to persuade Bryn to disengage himself from his scooter, if only for the time it would take to read the book.

And a way to buy some moments of silence. Just a few. Really. Whoever said that constant chattering was a female thing really just needed to do a fly-by. Any ten minute observation would bring forth an 100% result for airtime usage. And it would always be entirely Bryn making exhausting use of every moment he wasn't actually inhaling.

Lingering on each page, to maximise both the quiet, and the soothing closeness of his darling person, Meg's voice songfully played out every nuance of meaning. Words were jewels she rolled round her mouth. Treasures that took her skyward and far away from all the ordinary her eyes could see around them. Delights to savour.

Bryn felt his heart soar as Mummy enthused about the funny words.

"Penelope's passion was piqued by the purple primroses."

"Look Bryn! See Penelope's face! She just loves those flowers! They're primroses, Bryn. Primroses!  Aunty Sare lives in Primrose Street! Fancy that!"

And as both their hearts soared skyward, their bodies pressed in close.

How piqued were you guys by piqued? I'm intrigued to see how differently you've played with it, so I'm off for my visiting. I'm much earlier tonight than last week, so more of you may be up than just me and HoP!
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  1. I have to admit at the start I thought Bryn and Meg were lovers but then I so related to this piece as that's how I am with my son. He does love when I read to him, only things that are of interest to him of course, but it's getting him to settle down for 5 minutes so he can soak it all in. The complete polar opposite from my daughter who is a real book worm. One of them had to be! LOL

    Enjoyed this piece thoroughly.

    Anne xx

  2. I love this! My nephew always says, "Aunt J-me, you read funny. I like it." You captured it perfectly. Thank you.

  3. Lovely piece, full of joy and innocence and simple pleasures. :)

  4. This is a heart warming piece and I love the way that you've incorporated 'pique'.

    The line 'folded together in an almost yoga-knot' is such a truism when reading stories with a snuggly child.

    xx felicity

  5. I loved this piece! Such a true mothering moment! Also because I have a Bryn (I did a double take when I read the name, you don't see it often) and he talks CONSTANTLY, so you could really have been writing about a strategy I have actually used to get cuddles and little peace and quiet!!!

  6. "Words were jewels she rolled around her mouth...What a perfect description! I think you are getting more and more confident each week and it shows in your writing. Like last week, I love the insight you give us into your process...

    You have described a precious moment beautifully AND used the prompt in a clever, natural way. Awesome

    Gill x

  7. Hi guys! Thank you for your lovely feedback.

    How funny you have a Bryn, Sif! I've always loved the name. Small mountain, I think it means. I always thought that was a good combination of qualities for a man. Substantial, but humble is how I took it.

    Reading is just a delicious pleasure to share with our babes. Lovely to hear of all your moments too.

  8. Gill: thanks for your feedback. I think I am finding some confidence. I've always loved writing letters and so forth, and have even teaching writing, but I've never thought of myself as ever doing any fiction. I've loved the grand idea of producing a novel, but that's comfortably impossible. It's a bit of a surprise to me to find I've got anything much inside that will come out. Your environment, and the community you're creating, is so relaxed and comfortable that I do feel it's OK to give it a go. XXX

  9. I can relate to this tender moment between Mother and Son. I love nothing more that curling up with my little boy and enjoying words together.

    You've used some beautiful descriptions here, I particularly love the last line...wonderful.

  10. Such a tender piece! I loved the feeling of warmth that you created :)

  11. This is a lovely story Lorraine. I'm impressed by your word smithery :D


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